ILLNESS

Sunday, April 21, 2002

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Ann wrote @ 10:14 PM CST ..::♥::..

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Ann wrote @ 10:13 PM CST ..::♥::..

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Ann wrote @ 06:22 PM CST ..::♥::..

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Ann wrote @ 06:16 PM CST ..::♥::..

Saturday, April 20, 2002

Movie Recommendation

Last night we watched "Ghost World" on video. Although I really enjoyed Lynch's "Mulholland Drive" from the night before, which left me feeling in a surreal state all day, "Ghost World" is by far the best movie I've seen in ages. It stars Steve Buscemi as a loner named Seymour who collects old music and memorabilia from bygone eras. He's befriended by a new high school graduate, Enid, who is at that vulnerable changeable directionless stage. It was funny, it was sad. Although movies like "Pulp Fiction" and "Fargo" (more great Buscemi roles, even though the former is just a cameo) are just incredibly wonderful, engaging movies and a couple of my all time faves, only a few movies can I claim to be "me." "Velvet Goldmine" is an Ann movie..."Ghost World" is another.

Ann wrote @ 10:25 AM CST ..::♥::..

DREAM

I dreamt one of my Golden/Western newts died. I also dreamt of a very strange greenhouse building structure with lots of my plants in it. Many were turning brown and didn't look healthy. I think the actual greenhouse was located on some Madison Parks and Rec land, like at Tenney Park or someplace, although it was mine nonetheless. Weird.

Ann wrote @ 10:17 AM CST ..::♥::..

Friday, April 19, 2002

DREAM

Weird combination of watching David Lynch's "Mulholland Drive", a thunderstorm and drinking cappucino late at night produced weird dreams.

There was a part of this dream that preceded this, but I forgot it...something to do with travelling and having to get ready to leave for somewhere, but I forgot most of it. The part of it that was vivid was going into the chemistry building at CSU with my dad and Stan (My dad was the stockroom manager and I worked there myself while in college and a little afterward). It was late at night and I have no idea why we were there as my dad is several years retired. It was also the original building, not the new building they built after I moved to Madison that I'd never seen. I was bored so I started wandering around the basement. There was a chemistry professor there with some of his students. They all towered over me, it was as if I was a small child. The professor scowled and asked me what I was doing there. I told him I was just trying to find the bathroom and acted like I had every right to be there. I went up the stairs and found a large lobby that looked like a computer resource room or library. There were tables of computer monitors without the computers, so I assumed they were the original iMacs, but they were huge, like with 21" screens. I wandered around the room, which was very maze-like, and discovered I was quite lost. I kept trying to find my way back to the staircase that led down to the basement and found myself down a very darkened hallway. I was quite frightened, and was worried that Stan and my dad were worried about my whereabouts as well.

The next dream occurred in the early morning. I was in a garden, sitting down by a stone wall and discovered an old planter that had been long abandonned, but there were remnants of living hydrangeas inside of it. The leaves were dark brown, but I could tell it was still alive. Then there were these large caterpillars that started emerging from the planter. They were about 7 inches long, pearly white with very thick bodies and small heads. I said in my dream, "I've seen these caterpillars before." They had strange iridescent appendages coming out of their bodies that looked like parasitic flies.

Ann wrote @ 09:36 AM CST ..::♥::..

Thursday, April 18, 2002

Unfinished

There is a finch outside my computer room window that has built a nest inside the awning. I hate awnings, and one of the first things we did when we moved into the house was remove all the awnings on all the windows. We only kept two awnings, one on the front door and one on this 2nd floor back window (which in actuality is a door, but because of stupid city ordinances has been relegated to window-usage only because the former deck has been long-gone...long story). We decided to keep them for pure functionality, and that was to keep the rain away, I think. I've since thought that I want those two last awnings removed...I really hate them. But now with the bird there, we won't be able to remove that back awning. It sings all the time, and when I try to get close to see it, sometimes I scare it away and then I feel bad. Yesterday I saw her mate feed her a tidbit. It was really sweet. I cannot concentrate on doing anything with this bird singing, and the warm breezes blowing, and the flowers blooming. I am not even interetested in finishing this entry.

Ann wrote @ 09:21 AM CST ..::♥::..

DREAM

Stan had a son by another woman. In the time of the dream, I watched the child progress from baby to toddler, like some tv documentary. He was not getting along with the mother, and she would not let Stan see the child anymore. We were both quite disappointed by that decision. The really odd thing is that I wasn't mad at Stan for cheating on me. I remember once I had a dream where he had a girlfriend or somesuch and I woke up and felt much anger, even though it was such a silly dream. Once my mom dreamt that my dad had been married before, and when she woke up, she was quite mad at him, even though rationally she knew it was just a dream. It's hard to suppress the emotions that dreams leave us with.

Ann wrote @ 09:10 AM CST ..::♥::..

Tuesday, April 16, 2002

About the Weather

Record setting temperature of 87 yesterday, 30 degrees higher than the norm. It's surreal for it to be so hot but for there to be no leaves on the trees. It's as if there was a global disaster. I remember earlier this winter it was also unseasonably warm--we had Snowdrops blooming in January. Then when it turned spring, it was unseasonably cold. We literally had our winter in March, and our March and April in February. I think we're having June in April, so we'll have April in May and I'm predicting a really awful snowstorm in that month too. The weather just seems extremely screwed up lately.

Ann wrote @ 09:30 AM CST ..::♥::..

Friday, April 12, 2002

Psychograms and Psychicgrams

OK, first the Psychogram. Guestbook signage. It's been so long since I've gotten one of these. I guess she found my site again after being in rehab. This time she's going by "Melody."

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Name:   Melody
How did you get here?   blogplates webring
Comments:   Your site doesn't look very professional, you should think about changing the layout before even attempting to offer your low quality unoriginal graphics. Just a little constructive criticism, don't take it too harshly! (winking smiley graphic)
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Melody's really got to stop using those non-CSS compliant Version 3 browsers.

Now the Psychicgram. Yesterday, I was paid a visit from a local gallery director. She really liked my work and offered me a choice of time slots in the summer. I'm aiming for July. More details to come. She had gone to the UW Madison as well, began her MFA after Stan got his, and had the same or at least similar set of "turds" (her words!) for profs as we did. It's so wonderful to know that you're not the only one who didn't have a good experience at the UW Art Department. She gave us lots of juicy gossip on "Where are they now." Let's just say it's pretty incredible...Affairs, backstabbing, betrayal, power trips, alcoholism, murder for hire...well, not murder, but *almost.* Pretty amazing. That place was was such a hotbed of nasty politics...it's so nice to see it hasn't changed. I just hope no student was harmed in this latest little passion play for professiorial alpha dominance, as they so liked to use us as their pawns. But I digress. She also happened to mention something about a South Asian conference that was going to be held at the UW, and that her gallery was going to host an art exhibit featuring South Asian art. I couldn't believe my ears when she said this. Remember my dream a few days ago? I told her that I dreamt about this, but I had no idea anything like this was going to take place. She said, "How could you? Nothing has been printed up yet." Whoah. That is extremely weird. Extremely so. Stan was quite non-phased. "You're psychic," he said, "it's not amazing, it's just the way you are." It's still pretty weird to me.

Ann wrote @ 08:56 AM CST ..::♥::..

Thursday, April 11, 2002

DREAM

A weird dream where I was one of three people, one of whom I can't remember and the other who appeared to be Robert DeNiro. We were involved in some sort of plot to create a bomb. We were conspiring at my parent's house, and at times had to move outside and into the bushes so that people wouldn't hear us talking. I think my mom was there and being very "milk and cookies" and totally oblivious to what we were talking about. I wish I could remember more of it, but I dreamt it earlier in the night, so I can't retrieve it. I wish I could, as any dream with Robert DeNiro is certainly worth remembering!

Ann wrote @ 09:33 AM CST ..::♥::..